Horror Story - This is no Joke

THIS IS NO JOKE - Sheer Horror

Short Fiction

by

VIKRAM KARVE




Read this slowly and carefully.

Take your time.

Savour every word.

Try to enjoy it.

For it is going to be the last thing you ever read, because you’re not going to read much after this.

That’s because by the time you finish reading this, I am going to finish you off.

Yes. You read right.

I am going to finish you off once and for all.

Murder you in cold blood.

Till you are dead.

RIP.

Requiescat in pace.

Or is it requiescant in pace?

It just doesn’t matter.

But you for sure are going to rest in peace.

That’s right. Rest in Peace.

Rest in Peace!

RIP.

Forever.

You think this is a big joke?

It is not a joke. Yes, my friend, this is no joke.

I’m going to terminate you.

I’ve been watching you for days. You’re so nice and healthy. That is why I have no compunctions, as I firmly believe that my victim ought to be in good health, since it is barbarous to kill anybody who is weak or of a sickly disposition.

After you finish reading this, just sit back and relax.

But don't turn around and look behind you.

That's right - DO NOT LOOK BEHIND YOU.

I know you can find excuses to hang around your house, or your office, or wherever you are reading this; but sooner or later you’re going to have to get up and go out.

That’s where I’ll be waiting for you.

Or maybe I am closer to you than that.

Maybe I am in this very room where you are sitting.

You think of death as something far distant, don’t you?

It is not! Death is very near, very close to you. Maybe just behind you.

Believe me. I’m dead serious. Your death is just lurking behind your back.

Do not look behind you.

Come on, dear Reader. Tell me. Where are you reading this?

In your room late at night on your PC, or in your office, or on your laptop, in bed, or outdoors, or while traveling, or on a lazy Sunday afternoon?

Or have you taken a printout and are reading this propped up on your pillow in bed late at night?

It doesn't matter. It just doesn’t matter.

Because I’m going to come and get you the moment you finish reading this.

You can take my word for it.

If you are home while reading this, maybe I’m in your house with you right now, maybe in this very room, stealthily creeping right behind you, waiting for you to finish the story.

Do not look behind you.

Maybe I’m watching surreptitiously though your office window, or maybe I am standing menacingly right behind you as you sit at your work desk staring at the monitor, waiting to pierce you with the deadly needle of the venom filled hypodermic syringe the moment you finish reading this.

Just sit still and keep reading.

Do not look behind you.

Or maybe I’m sitting covertly right next to you in the Internet café where you are reading this.

Don’t look! Please do not turn around and look.

Just keep reading.

Maybe I’m waiting outside for you.

But don’t look around.

You’ll be happier if you don’t know – if you don’t see the needle coming.

So please do not look behind you.

But wherever you are reading this, I’m near you, watching and waiting for you to finish.

And then I’ll silently slither right behind you.

And from the right pocket of my trousers I’ll carefully take out the lethal syringe.


Don’t be scared.

You won’t feel a thing.

Maybe just a wee little scratch, a teeny weeny prick of a tiny microscopic needle.

And you will die instantly.

It’s much better killing this way – instantaneous, effortless, clean, clinical. I like it this way.

When I kill people this way they don’t even come to know.

Unless they turn around and look.

So don’t look behind you!

I am warning you, just don't turn around and look behind you.

You don’t believe in the macabre, do you?

You think my imagination is running wild and this is just my amateurish attempt at writing a short story, don’t you?

Go on; smile to yourself, thinking this is just a joke, a fib, a yarn.

This is no joke.

Don’t look behind you. Please do not look behind you.

You don't believe me?

Okay, don’t believe me – until you feel the gentle prick of the hypodermic needle penetrating deep into your spine.


VIKRAM KARVE

Copyright © Vikram Karve 2009
Vikram Karve has asserted his right under the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988 to be identified as the author of this work.