HOW TO CONQUER STRESS
by
VIKRAM KARVE
In my opinion the term “Stress Management” is an oxymoron.
First you create stress within yourself, and then try to “manage” it.
Funny, isn’t it?
Why not prevent stress in the first place?
Focus on “stress prevention” rather than “stress management”.
Let’s try one way how to do this.
Long back, sometime in the 1960’s, when I was a small boy, my father took me to visit Belur Math, and there I acquired a tiny pocket book called “Thus Spake Vivekananda”.
Whenever the chips were down, or I felt dejected, I referred to the inspiring gems of wisdom, distilled from the complete works of Swami Vivekanada, for instant motivation and strength.
Here’s one of those gems of wisdom, a phrase from the sayings of Swami Vivekananda:
Anything that makes you weak physically, intellectually, and spiritually, reject as poison.
I feel that the word “weak” is all encompassing and embraces anything that creates in you a stressful situation like all negative emotions and feelings including anger, irritation, infuriation, frustration, despondency, depression, demoralization, unhappiness – anything that disturbs your inner tranquility and equanimity, drains you emotionally and intellectually, besides literal physical weakness.
Oh yes, Stress is weakness, Stress is Poison!
Now sit down in a quiet tranquil place, close your eyes, introspect, and try to think of all the things that make you feel negative – all your stress-creators and stressful situations.
These can be anything – toxic or incompatible persons, who irritate, annoy and hassle you, allergic or irritating foods and beverages (especially alcoholic drinks) which don’t suit you and are physically detrimental to your health, certain activities and events, which may appear pleasurable at the first instance, but actually drain you out and make you feel fatigued, depleted and depressed, modern technology and gadgets, like your cell-phone, which disturb your peace of mind, and strained relationships, which are a source of stress.
Make an exhaustive list of all the things, activities and entities, that make you “weak” and try to reject them as “poison”.
At first you may be a bit skeptical about this approach, but when you start implementing, you’ll be surprised how much it is in your own control to prevent stress.
While you reject the things that make you weak, you must also reinforce the things that make you feel "strong" and positive.
So simultaneously, reflect and contemplate, and make a list of things which give you strength and joy, make you happy and productive – all the things and people that create positive feelings in you – and try to devote as much time and energy to these positive things that give you strength and make you feel good.
This technique of stress prevention works for me, and I’m sure it’ll work for you too.
You will realise that this way of conquering stress and banishing it from your life is so effective probably because it is so breathtaking in its simplicity.
And once stress disappears from your life, you will feel good -- you can take my word for it.
VIKRAM KARVE
vikramkarve@sify.com
http://vikramkarve.sulekha.com/
http://www.linkedin.com/in/karve
Showing posts with label stress. Show all posts
Showing posts with label stress. Show all posts
Thursday, September 10, 2009
STRESS MANAGEMENT
HOW TO CONQUER STRESS
by
VIKRAM KARVE
In my opinion the term “Stress Management” is an oxymoron.
First you create stress within yourself, and then try to “manage” it.
Funny, isn’t it?
Why not prevent stress in the first place?
Focus on “stress prevention” rather than “stress management”.
Let’s try one way how to do this.
Long back, sometime in the 1960’s, when I was a small boy, my father took me to visit Belur Math, and there I acquired a tiny pocket book called “Thus Spake Vivekananda”.
Whenever the chips were down, or I felt dejected, I referred to the inspiring gems of wisdom, distilled from the complete works of Swami Vivekanada, for instant motivation and strength.
Here’s one of those gems of wisdom, a phrase from the sayings of Swami Vivekananda:
Anything that makes you weak physically, intellectually, and spiritually, reject as poison.
I feel that the word “weak” is all encompassing and embraces anything that creates in you a stressful situation like all negative emotions and feelings including anger, irritation, infuriation, frustration, despondency, depression, demoralization, unhappiness – anything that disturbs your inner tranquility and equanimity, drains you emotionally and intellectually, besides literal physical weakness.
Oh yes, Stress is weakness, Stress is Poison!
Now sit down in a quiet tranquil place, close your eyes, introspect, and try to think of all the things that make you feel negative – all your stress-creators and stressful situations.
These can be anything – toxic or incompatible persons, who irritate, annoy and hassle you, allergic or irritating foods and beverages (especially alcoholic drinks) which don’t suit you and are physically detrimental to your health, certain activities and events, which may appear pleasurable at the first instance, but actually drain you out and make you feel fatigued, depleted and depressed, modern technology and gadgets, like your cell-phone, which disturb your peace of mind, and strained relationships, which are a source of stress.
Make an exhaustive list of all the things, activities and entities, that make you “weak” and try to reject them as “poison”.
At first you may be a bit skeptical about this approach, but when you start implementing, you’ll be surprised how much it is in your own control to prevent stress.
While you reject the things that make you weak, you must also reinforce the things that make you feel "strong" and positive.
So simultaneously, reflect and contemplate, and make a list of things which give you strength and joy, make you happy and productive – all the things and people that create positive feelings in you – and try to devote as much time and energy to these positive things that give you strength and make you feel good.
This technique of stress prevention works for me, and I’m sure it’ll work for you too.
You will realise that this way of conquering stress and banishing it from your life is so effective probably because it is so breathtaking in its simplicity.
And once stress disappears from your life, you will feel good -- you can take my word for it.
VIKRAM KARVE
vikramkarve@sify.com
http://vikramkarve.sulekha.com/
http://www.linkedin.com/in/karve
by
VIKRAM KARVE
In my opinion the term “Stress Management” is an oxymoron.
First you create stress within yourself, and then try to “manage” it.
Funny, isn’t it?
Why not prevent stress in the first place?
Focus on “stress prevention” rather than “stress management”.
Let’s try one way how to do this.
Long back, sometime in the 1960’s, when I was a small boy, my father took me to visit Belur Math, and there I acquired a tiny pocket book called “Thus Spake Vivekananda”.
Whenever the chips were down, or I felt dejected, I referred to the inspiring gems of wisdom, distilled from the complete works of Swami Vivekanada, for instant motivation and strength.
Here’s one of those gems of wisdom, a phrase from the sayings of Swami Vivekananda:
Anything that makes you weak physically, intellectually, and spiritually, reject as poison.
I feel that the word “weak” is all encompassing and embraces anything that creates in you a stressful situation like all negative emotions and feelings including anger, irritation, infuriation, frustration, despondency, depression, demoralization, unhappiness – anything that disturbs your inner tranquility and equanimity, drains you emotionally and intellectually, besides literal physical weakness.
Oh yes, Stress is weakness, Stress is Poison!
Now sit down in a quiet tranquil place, close your eyes, introspect, and try to think of all the things that make you feel negative – all your stress-creators and stressful situations.
These can be anything – toxic or incompatible persons, who irritate, annoy and hassle you, allergic or irritating foods and beverages (especially alcoholic drinks) which don’t suit you and are physically detrimental to your health, certain activities and events, which may appear pleasurable at the first instance, but actually drain you out and make you feel fatigued, depleted and depressed, modern technology and gadgets, like your cell-phone, which disturb your peace of mind, and strained relationships, which are a source of stress.
Make an exhaustive list of all the things, activities and entities, that make you “weak” and try to reject them as “poison”.
At first you may be a bit skeptical about this approach, but when you start implementing, you’ll be surprised how much it is in your own control to prevent stress.
While you reject the things that make you weak, you must also reinforce the things that make you feel "strong" and positive.
So simultaneously, reflect and contemplate, and make a list of things which give you strength and joy, make you happy and productive – all the things and people that create positive feelings in you – and try to devote as much time and energy to these positive things that give you strength and make you feel good.
This technique of stress prevention works for me, and I’m sure it’ll work for you too.
You will realise that this way of conquering stress and banishing it from your life is so effective probably because it is so breathtaking in its simplicity.
And once stress disappears from your life, you will feel good -- you can take my word for it.
VIKRAM KARVE
vikramkarve@sify.com
http://vikramkarve.sulekha.com/
http://www.linkedin.com/in/karve
Monday, July 13, 2009
Conflict, Frustration, Stress
PATHS TO FRUSTRATION
[Musings]
By
VIKRAM KARVE
Frustration can be a major cause of stress in your daily life and it may be worthwhile to ponder on the various reasons for your frustration.
Well, here is one.
People often become frustrated when they must choose between their personal desires and pleasing other people.
There are five basic ways people react in such situations of conflict between personal goals versus interpersonal relationships and each type of response can be a source of frustration.
EGOIST: First of all, a person may pursue his personal desires and forget about interpersonal relationships. The individual so described would be the EGOIST who cares little about stepping on others as long as he or she gets to the top of the ladder or achieves his or her personal goals. An Egoist’s frustration emanates from the displeasure of others. The others may outwardly smile at him because of his power but they secretly would like to “stab him in the back” and the egoist knows this and it inwardly pricks his conscience deep inside.
ALTRUIST: Second, a person may try to please everyone by setting aside his own aspirations. This individual is afflicted by “The Disease to Please” and is a person who can never say “NO”. His frustration results from lack of personal achievement and the realization that complete altruism is not always self-satisfying.
WHEELER-DEALER: Third, a person may try to achieve all his ambitions and simultaneously please everyone. This person is the typical “Wheeler-Dealer”. He is maximally frustrated, since it is virtually an impossible task to be all things to all people and please everyone, including his own self, all the time in all situations.
HERMIT: Fourth, a person may decide to be an ostrich and bury his head in the sand. This describes the HERMIT. He also becomes very frustrated because he achieves nothing and pleases no one, not even himself.
COMPROMISER: Fifth and finally, one may choose to go halfway. Such a person is the compromiser or the person who can’t seem to make up his mind. But even he is frustrated because he may sacrifice worthwhile personal goals or fail really to please some important people, since he has decided on a middle course.
WORK OUT YOUR OWN SOLUTION:
Dear Reader, sit in silent solitude, close your eyes, reflect, introspect, think of your recent situations of conflict between your personal desires and pleasing others.
Are you an egoist, altruist, wheeler-dealer, hermit or a compromiser?
Or are you somewhere in between?
Do you change with different personal desires and different people, or is your behaviour consistent with everyone?
You have to work out own solution; understanding yourself is the first step.
VIKRAM KARVE
Copyright © Vikram Karve 2009
Vikram Karve has asserted his right under the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988 to be identified as the author of this work.
http://vikramkarve.sulekha.com
http://www.linkedin.com/in/karve
vikramkarve@hotmail.com
vikramkarve@sify.com
[Musings]
By
VIKRAM KARVE
Frustration can be a major cause of stress in your daily life and it may be worthwhile to ponder on the various reasons for your frustration.
Well, here is one.
People often become frustrated when they must choose between their personal desires and pleasing other people.
There are five basic ways people react in such situations of conflict between personal goals versus interpersonal relationships and each type of response can be a source of frustration.
EGOIST: First of all, a person may pursue his personal desires and forget about interpersonal relationships. The individual so described would be the EGOIST who cares little about stepping on others as long as he or she gets to the top of the ladder or achieves his or her personal goals. An Egoist’s frustration emanates from the displeasure of others. The others may outwardly smile at him because of his power but they secretly would like to “stab him in the back” and the egoist knows this and it inwardly pricks his conscience deep inside.
ALTRUIST: Second, a person may try to please everyone by setting aside his own aspirations. This individual is afflicted by “The Disease to Please” and is a person who can never say “NO”. His frustration results from lack of personal achievement and the realization that complete altruism is not always self-satisfying.
WHEELER-DEALER: Third, a person may try to achieve all his ambitions and simultaneously please everyone. This person is the typical “Wheeler-Dealer”. He is maximally frustrated, since it is virtually an impossible task to be all things to all people and please everyone, including his own self, all the time in all situations.
HERMIT: Fourth, a person may decide to be an ostrich and bury his head in the sand. This describes the HERMIT. He also becomes very frustrated because he achieves nothing and pleases no one, not even himself.
COMPROMISER: Fifth and finally, one may choose to go halfway. Such a person is the compromiser or the person who can’t seem to make up his mind. But even he is frustrated because he may sacrifice worthwhile personal goals or fail really to please some important people, since he has decided on a middle course.
WORK OUT YOUR OWN SOLUTION:
Dear Reader, sit in silent solitude, close your eyes, reflect, introspect, think of your recent situations of conflict between your personal desires and pleasing others.
Are you an egoist, altruist, wheeler-dealer, hermit or a compromiser?
Or are you somewhere in between?
Do you change with different personal desires and different people, or is your behaviour consistent with everyone?
You have to work out own solution; understanding yourself is the first step.
VIKRAM KARVE
Copyright © Vikram Karve 2009
Vikram Karve has asserted his right under the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988 to be identified as the author of this work.
http://vikramkarve.sulekha.com
http://www.linkedin.com/in/karve
vikramkarve@hotmail.com
vikramkarve@sify.com
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